Take me home, El Capitan!

"Gather 'round, lads.... gather 'round"...
Burt Lancaster / The Crimson Pirate (1952)

Around every other month, when I deem you are worthy, we post our cheesy newsletter to inform the masses as to what's happening in the BMW world and of course... Pirates' Lair. How else are you going to find out?

Warning: While I do try to add a little humor in every newsletter, some of my language may offend the mild mannered, politically correct, liberal, or meek amongst us. If you are offended easily I suggest you stop reading here and look elsewhere for your written info-tainment.

FYI.. If you'd like to be notified when each new newsletter is posted, just email me with your request and I'll make that happen. Our email database is 100% secure. Stored in a lock box formerly owned by Al Gore. Never shared or sold to third parties. Never perused by the NSA.

Prepare to be boarded!
The Latest Cheesy Pirates' Lair Newsletter: May 2003 Issue

Fellow esteemed and quasi-esteemed K12 Riders.....The restraining order has just expired and now I'm back with another in a painfully endless string of cheesy newsletters to invade your personal space and clutter your in-box, but with the noble intent of informing you of what's new in the BMW K1200RS/GT community and... at Pirates' Lair.

K1200RS/GT Rally Info: Past and Future
The Texas Hill Country K12 Rally was a huge success. I missed this one due to our move to Asheville, but all I spoke with have said the roads were killer, the weather was excellent, and that Barry Gibbs (the organizer) looked much older in person. The rally photos are at www.nine-eleven.com/rally, on the page titled 2003 Photos. One perk of the rally was that one rider determined once and for all that the K1200RS can NOT be used as a flotation device.

The Blue Ridge Parkway K12 Rally held in Staunton, Va was a success in spite of the liquid weather... over 50 showed up. I for one had a great time. Lots of new people showed... and lots of old people showed... I've posted a few pics at http://www.piratesk12site.net//BRPW.htm

I heard that the lovely George Colvin and the un-lovely Jim Florshinger of GC Creative have quite a few BRPR Rally Tee's left over due to the many no-shows. Keep in mind that they spend their own money to produce these tees for people who say they're gonna be there. If you want one they are a paltry $14.00 delivered. You can email them at george@gccreative.net or contact me and I'll hook you up. Look stylish and support the cause...

Next Up:
The 4th Annual Deals Gap K12 Rally
: Hold the presses!! Looks like we may have a glitch in the Matrix..Dates have changed from the last 3 years.Tentative dates are now Sep 18, 19, 20th for the 4th Annual Deals Gap area in NC. Group leaders will be pondering this new turn of events on the "tree of woe" (obscure Conan reference) this week and will announce the final place and time at www.i-bmw.com as soon as we figure out a game plan. IMHO.. this is the year's premier K12 event. If at all possible this is the one you should not miss. Stay tuned!

News From the Front: A short note from Mein Furor... Vic Salemme of www.i-bmw.com
Hi guys:
For the old server (had to do a quick rack change):
The main I-BMW.com page will be updated shortly to reflect a direct click through to the forum, however, you can avoid the wait & gain access by simply substituting the I.P. string " " in place of the " " string now.
Here's an illustration: - Simply click on the second string to enter - update bookmarks as you like.

What's new in the K1200RS News...?

1. Looks like there's about to be a new kid on the block..No.. not the sissy boy-group, but a new exhaust system from RB Racing will be released by mid-summer. The K1200RS Black Hole Exhaust is sold as a complete system with new high horsepower injectors, a high-flow fuel rail (whatever the f*#@ that is), and a new pressure regulator system. According to their cryptic web page, there is no need to purchase "useless" chips or piggyback systems. No HP stats are given. Why? Who knows. Cost for the complete K1200RS system is $1,195.00 including the injectors, fuel rail and new pressure regulator. I wonder how many owners are capable enough to install these items.. or how many dealers would be willing? and at what cost? Check it out at http://www.rbracing-rsr.com/bmwexhausts.html All I can say is.. they're gonna have to show me the money...

2. Can't see s#@* at night? Old eyes? Still blindfolded from last night's role-playing? There's a new HID Kit on the market for the KRS/GT from The Lighting Research that is guaranteed to light up your life The kit comes with a Philips bulb, Hella ballast, fused wiring harness, and a mounting bracket for the ballast. The kit even comes with a bracket that makes mounting the ballast much easier. The Lighting Research website is pretty bad, so you're better off giving them a call. They like to sell units in pairs (for the best price), but they'll sell it to you through your dealer for $230 plus $20 shipping. www.lightingresearch.com

3. Verholen has discontinued their 100mm Barbacks.... No more will be produced...Reason?.. No or little demand. Kind of renews my faith in humanity.

4. Cruise Controls!!..The Australian Guymer Brothers who for a few years used to sell the MotorCycle Cruise Controls for the 98-01 KRS are about to start selling them again. As you'll recall... they had to stop selling them due to parts availability problems. Problems must have been resolved as they just informed me that they should be back on the market in about 4 weeks.. and like before, Pirates' Lair will get them first. No idea what the price will be. As I recall they were about $480 or $500.US. Out of all the ones we sold, not a single one has ever been returned or had to be replaced due to probs. Those suckers were and are bullet-proof.. unlike the problem plagued factory models on the new bikes.

5. Whether you buy from us or somebody else.. Garmin International is currently offering a $100 factory rebate on the Street Pilot 3 GPS I think it's going on for a few more weeks. http://www.garmin.com/whatsNew/currentpromotions/ or 800-800-1020

6. American Machine has just about completed their GT barbacks. They tell me I should have some prototypes in my hands THIS week. Looks like it's gonna be a race to see who gets them to the market first.. American or Suburban Machinery who is also working on some. Spoke to the Am Ma guys a few days ago and they say they can complete the project in just a few more days. Only details I have are that like their RS barbacks, the GT ‘backs will only be available in a 30mm length and require no mods or longer cables.

7. Vice president, Mac Heaton of Autosol sent us some samples of their metal polish this last week that has rocked my bubble-boy, mysophobic world. As you may or may not know, I have a Staintune exhaust on my bike, and while I love the look and sound, the incessant yellowing is a pisser (technical term) to live with. I've been using either the time proven Semi-Chrome Polish or Wenol for as long as my short term memory can recall (both German products), but this Autosol product puts them both to shame. IMHO, it's the best metal polish I have seen in 30+ years. It certainly works wonders on my stainless steel ‘tune. You can reach them at 866.288.6765 or look and be amazed at www.autosol.us BTW.. they also sell some leather cleaner.. I tried it as well and was NOT impressed.

8. Parabellum has a new Tall Windshield on the market for the 02+ RS at http://www.parabellum.com/ It's available in +6" or +8" heights. Both heights are 2" wider than stock. Word is that they also have one for the GT You'll need to call them to substantiate this rumor since it has not appeared on their website yet.

9. Bestrest Products at http://www.bestrestproducts.com has a new rear luggage rack on the market that fits both the RS and GT's called the CargoRest. You buy a standard mounting kit and then choose from 3 different size platforms to mount on it. The brackets are (I'm told) a 20 minute easy install with no mods necessary to your bike. They are also about to release a new backrest for the K1200RS/GT called the Sprint. It's height adjustable and works in conjunction with the CargoRest. With the Model C CargoRest and a K12 Fit Kit mounting package, a rider will have a luggage rack AND a fully adjustable Sprint BackRest for $405. Am I worried about the competition?... nope.. different niche...

10. Word up Two Brothers Exhaust owners!! Just learned that you should re-pack your pipes as recommended or expect some possible troubles down the road. I was under the impression that if you do NOT re-pack them at certain mileage intervals it will just get louder. Wrong! I just learned that the packing also serves as a vibration dampener of sorts and with out proper packing the rivets will loosen and can actually break on the inside. Not a good thing as our own VicS will tell you.

11. S & R Motorsports at http://www.streetracerparts.com/index.htm is making white faced gauges for both sport bikes and cars. Have spoken with these guys and they have agreed to produce some for the K1200RS/GT's if I want to furnish them with a dash panel and some $$. While I know I'd like to have these facings for my bike, not sure if there is a market for them. They assure me that the face fonts/numbers will look identical in every detail down to the BMW logo and would be much brighter at night, but I wonder how hard it would be to install.... and how many of us would really be willing to tear apart the dash for the install... Not sure if I want to proceed on this one. If enough people are interested, perhaps we could get it done. Opinions welcome.

What's new at Pirates' Lair?

1. Our K1200RS/GT Custom Footpeg Kits are almost complete and should be available within a few weeks. Just waiting for the final prototypes to arrive from the UK for an OK before placing the first order.. They'll weigh ½ as much as the stock pegs and offer a little more ground clearance while keeping the pegs at exactly the same height. The kits will come with matching front and rear pegs and will be offered in a variety of colors... Silver, Blue, Red, Black, Gold....web page should be up shortly at http://piratesk12site.net/TopGear.htm

2. Our K1200LT section is finally up and generating taxable income at http://piratesk12site.net/K12LTIntro.htm Spread the word... or not... Our first LT ads should start appearing in BMWON in about 2 months.

3. You can breath a sigh of relief as the K1200RS Screensaver is finally available at www.piratesk12site.net/Screensaver.htm All profits go to the individual who makes our website possible..Webmaster Wayne. He chose the shots, put it all together into a waaay cool CD-Rom package (for PC only) , and ships them himself. And for the closet Neanderthals amongst us... the auto-load CD Rom practically installs itself. No need to drag the kids (or grand-kids) away from their X-Box. He's put a lot of work into it and it shows.Without him... we wouldn't be here.. and without this screensaver, your life will be incomplete.

4. Some may have noticed that just last week we had to raise our prices on the ZTechnik line of products...particularly the Z Exhaust. No.. we're not greedy... at least not in this circumstance. Apparently, some US dealers were whining about us selling the Z product line at below the exorbitantly high suggested retail prices of which the dealers are comfortable with. We had 2 choices... drop the entire line after investing mucho denero in web pages and design or sheepishly comply. Baaaaaaaaaah.
Coincidentally...Pirates' Lair is now offering our first REBATE OFFER!! For a limited time, Pirates' Lair is offering an in-house, instant $100 rebate on either the Z Exhaust or the Z Exhaust/Chip combo package.

5. The K12RS Solo Seat Cowlings are on the menu at http://piratesk12site.net/Solo.htm I am damn proud of them. Have had at least 1 dealer call us and ask what the BMW part# was on them as they couldn't find them in their own parts catalog... A compliment indeed.
These are currently being produced by hand out of fiberglass, which contributes to the exorbitant pricing, however... we have been in talks with a plastics manufacturer in Tennessee who has agreed to produce them for us out of thermo-plastic in the months to come. This should allow us to drop the price by at least $25 ea.. possibly more. They are now sold un-painted, but I have an agreement with Bavarian Cycle Works in California at 760.868.5726 to do the painting for anyone who doesn't have access to a good paint person. These fit ONLY the stock K12RS seat. Feedback and pictures have started to trickle in and ALL are positive. Customer comments can be viewed at http://piratesk12site.net/SoloComments.htm

6. Apparently, the Carbon Fiber Fenders that we sell are MUCH harder to produce than originally thought. A few years ago a company produced a few and then strangely stopped. Hmmm. About a year ago I hired a manufacturer in Canada to produce them for us and after 1 year and some semi-serious $$ invested... they delivered only ONE good fender. They valiantly wanted to keep trying but I had to bail. About 6 months ago a company in California produced a few good ones for the owner's K12RS. I heard about it... made a deal with them to produce quantity for me exclusively and they agreed... However... when they tried to produce more, they ran into the same probs as the other 2 places albeit with slightly better results. They did actually deliver 4 good ones and 4 nearly perfect ones a few weeks ago... (I had ordered 30)... All of those were pre-sold. They tell me that they will send a few at a time as they figure it out, but I expect to see middle-eastern peace before we get a good batch. If you want on a short waiting list... let me know. http://piratesk12site.net/CarbonFender.htm

7. Our one and only non-BMW product... the Honda ST1300 Stealth Backrest is nearly complete. We'll start road testing in about 2 weeks. You can see it at http://piratesk12site.net/ST13Stealth.htm It should bring in buckets and buckets of filthy lucre. 100% a biz decision.

8. T-Bags has discontinued their Texan Deluxe Bags that we had been carrying for our backrests and replaced them with the Universal Helmet Bag at http://piratesk12site.net/T-Bag.htm Unlike the Texan Deluxe, the Universal Helmet Bag comes standard with it's own rain liner and is a little cheaper. The only difference, that my tiny mind can discern is a slightly larger opening in the main compartment and the sleeve that slides over the backrest is an open sleeve to accommodate ANY size/shape backrest. I personally prefer the Texan, but according to T-Bags.. this is progress. In all fairness.. it is a nice bag and if you actually can get a helmet in it ( I haven't tried) that would be an improvement over the old bag.

9. My goal in life now (besides spending 2 weeks in Bora Bora, living in one of those over-water huts, sipping 40 year old dark rum while watching the local bare breasted beauties frolic in the pounding azure surf..aaaahh.. feel that sun....) er...where was I?? O, yea...My goal... is the K1200RS Fender Elimination Kit. The project has not started but the manufacturer has us penciled in for sometime this month. This project may be my crowning achievement (other than that cloning project I recently did for the Raelians.) What makes this even more interesting is that I have been contacted by Remus and they want to design an Underseat Exhaust if I can furnish them with a production fender elimination kit. Get ready for a new world order. BMW doesn't seem interested in making these bikes sportier....so I will. So it is written so let it be done.

New How-To Links at http://piratesk12site.net/Howto.htm
None this time around...Why? Apathy, perhaps... however..if you'd like to help others by contributing a How-To.. we'd be more than happy to link you up to our site. Might be your only chance to be respected and admired by your peers. Just send us the URL or if you are HTML ignorant.. maybe we could work it up for you if you furnish it on floppy disk or CD.

Guess that kinda wraps this one up. Take care.. and from me and Amber....Ride safe... ride fast.. see you .. in my mirrors.
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