"Gather 'round, lads.... gather 'round"...
Around the 15th of
each month, when I deem you are worthy, we put out our cheesy K12
newsletter to inform the masses as to what's happening in the BMW
K12RS/GT/S/R world and of course... Pirates'
Lair. How else are you going to find out? If you want to
subscribe and have these sent via e-mail to your home or office just let
us know at firstname.lastname@example.org ..
otherwise you'll get 95% of it here. Why only 95%? Because I tend to tell
the brutal truth as I see it on many issues/products and while I don't
mind spewing "my opinion" into your home, office or cell .. I have no
desire to slam, insult, or malign any company, individual, competitor in
public.. unless they blatantly deserve it.
The Latest Cheesy Pirates' Lair Newsletter: September 2005 Issue
|Fellow esteemed and quasi-esteemed motorcyclists.... ..A famous (and slightly edited ) movie moment to start the day.....|
Bond wakes up on the table in the middle of the room. A laser gun is aimed just behind Bond's head. Beyond him, stairs lead up to a control room. Goldfinger walks down the stairs, wearing a gold dinner jacket, a shirt with gold buttons and a black bow-tie. He approaches the table.
Oh, that interesting car of yours!
The purpose of our two previous encounters is now very clear to me.
I do not intend to be distracted by another. Goodnight, Mister
Goldfinger / Gert Frobe James Bond / Sean Connery / Goldfinger 1964
News From The Two-Wheeled No-Spin Zone...!!
|My Pic for Best New Product for 2005! : The No-Mar Tire Changer
Once every few years or so, when the moon is in the seventh house and Jupiter aligns with Mars, some revolutionary new product hits the market and changes the way we motorcyclists see and/or do things.. Products that change the face of the industry.. Heated riding clothing...radial tires...LED lights...Carbon Fiber..the Baxley Chock.... hanging license plate testicles. Just a few days ago I evaluated a new product that IMHO, will change the tire changing industry forever. Imagine an affordable tire changing machine that makes it virtually impossible to scratch your rims no matter how incompetent the user? Imagine not a single piece of metal touching your high dollar wheels during a tire change!.. Imagine a product that's not only younger, but has firmer breasts, no cellulite, and.. a mute button! er.. where was I??.. O, yea... Up until just recently if you wanted a top notch tire changer for under $1000 your only option was a Coats 220... which is what I own. I think I paid about $900 for mine with all the accouterments.. While it works well and is virtually indestructible, there are some downsides. It took me at least 4 changes for me to figure out how to change a tire without scratching a wheel and even now that I've done quite a few times, I still slip up now and then...Doh!!. The clamps on the Coats 220 are metal and while they do furnish tiny plastic clips to cover them, sooner or later you lose one and end up scratching your wheel... or they come off INSIDE the tire and you don't realize it until you have it aired, balanced, and are about to mount it on the bike!! F#@*! Also.. the 3' mounting iron is metal and the plastic cover that goes on the end flies off more often than my ex wife which also results in a scratched surface. and lastly, the bead breaker on the Coats is down on the floor meaning you have to bend over to get it done..
Enter the new kid on
the tire-mounting block .. the No-Mar Tire
Changer at http://www.nomartirechanger.com/
This unit not only has 3 plastic gripping cams that hold your wheel
securely during the change but an optional removal/installation bar has
this same plastic on the end. Besides a benchtop and floor model unit,
they also offer an adapter to mount their system on any Coats 220! The
bead breaker is up at waist high level which makes that task easier, as
well. In theory.. it would seem virtually impossible to scratch your rims
using the No-Mar Machine as only plastic is touching your wheel at any
step of the process. So simple!! Why hasn't anyone else thought of this!!
Why didn't I think of this?!! Doh!
|Before mounting my tire I was very skeptical that this system would
hold the tire in place and would have bet $1000 that the wheel would turn
during the actual mounting, but alas..like the time I bet big bucks that
Roberto Duran would wipe the floor with Sugar Ray Leonard.. (No mas!!)...
I would have lost. My wheel stayed completely secure during the process
and actually seemed to hold BETTER than the Coats' metal claws. !!??
Amazing. They also offer some all plastic Tire Clamps for $40 ea which I
thought would be foofoo useless but actually were VERY helpful and worked
perfectly to hold the bead down low enough for the tire to slide on
perfectly and effortlessly.. I am simply blown away by this design. I did
NOT try the No-Mar mounting bar as I have completely coated my Coats bar
with hard plastic which now works perfectly, but I'll assume it's just as
well thought out as everything else I received from them. . Bottom line.. no more scratched wheels... EVER.
Total cost looks to be about $595.+ shipping. Check them out at http://www.nomartirechanger.com/
and BTW... For my fellow Coats 220 owners out there... .the No-Mar plastic cam Coats 220 adapter is about $295
and IMHO.. worth every penny. It's even powder coated RED to match. Truly
inspired thinking went into this machine.. Heads up Coats..The No-Mar is
light-years beyond your 15 year old design and everything else I've seen
on the market !!! Time to stop resting on your aging laurels and
Lastly.. No.. I have no vested interest in No-Mar. The review was straight up with no perks.
International Shipping Heads-Up: A Tale of Woe and
What's New In the K1200RS/GT/S/R No-Spin Zone
you own a K1200R?? Bars not quite high enough or far back enough for you??
Germany just released their "R" Riser
kit to the market. Unlike their "S" version, this kit includes a
longer throttle cable AND longer brake line AND a lofty price tag. About
$350.US... As the brake line has to be changed and a bleed job done this
would be a dealer install, so you know what question that begs... "What's
in your wallet?!"|
2. We just heard the ONLY changes to the 2006 BMW K1200R and S will be an on-board computer which will read outside temp, ice warnings, range measurements, average fuel consumption and speed, the width of your wife's ass and IQ.
3. Speaking of new models.. we also heard the ONLY changes to the
2005-6 K1200GT's coming off the assembly line will be an ambient
temperature gauge. The new GT's will NOT be imported into the US...
5. Speaking of Solo Seat Cowlings... Pack Parts of Germany has yet another waaay cool offering for the new K1200R.. Check out their version of a solo cowling. Unlike the Corbin.. theirs works with the stock seat!! Looks to be about .. you'd better bend over and spread them for this.... a lofty $489 US dollars!! Ouch..and that's un-painted and doesn't include shipping!! Sounds like extortion to me.. Have never heard of any cowling for any bike at anywhere near that price. You know what PT Barnum said.....
6. The Two Bros Racing K1200S and R slip-ons are on the market!! They offer 3 versions.. Carbon Fiber, Titanium, and Aluminum in two different canister shapes... the C-5 Oval and the smaller M2 oval which has a colored tip. Retail will be about $650+ shipping.
7. Looking for a sleek, easily removable tank bag for your K1200RS/GT/S/R/MV? Don't need some massive chunk of Cordura mucking up the lines of your bike? Check out this waaay cool offering from Verholen of Germany... Looks just about perfect for around town riding or canyon blasting. If I were looking for a tankbag.. this would be it....
Staintune K1200S and
R slip-ons are on the market!! Retail Price will be $500.US They
claim a huge 10 peak horsepower gain through the range. If true..
10. Twisted Throttle Ltd. of Peacedale, RI is apparently the US importer of SW-Motech's (of Germany) aftermarket centerstand for the BMW K1200S and R. You can reach them at 401-709-9383 Retail is under $140.US That's a helluva lot cheaper than the BMW optional stand... Worth a look.
What's New at Pirates' Lair?
You asked for them.. and yet again we deliver.. We now have the K1200R/S Staintune
slip-on exhausts on the menu. They are claiming a full 10hp boost!!
Impressive for any slip-on.
2. Speaking of
exhausts... Just received our first shipment of Two Brothers
Slip-On exhausts for the new K1200S and R. Have to admit.. they look
superb. I love the all new M-2 canister with
the removable sound suppresser.. We have 5 choices, friends...Carbon,
Titanium, Aluminum in 2 different canister styles.
3. Nothing says.. "Top O' the world, ma" like carbon fiber . On the menu at http://pirateslair.net/ZCarbonS.htm for your viewing pleasure..a Carbon Fiber "K1200S" Tank Protector, Gas Cap, & 5 Piece Trim Kits from ZTechnik. We offer a stand alone tank protector or a complete 5 piece kit including a tank protector, 2 piece triple clamp trim, forward gas tank section, and a gauge cover. The Tank Protector and 5 Piece kit fit ONLY the K1200S.. NOT the R. Protect your beautiful paint job from daily use, zippers, buckles, leathers, etc. This isn't that faux crap that others sell. The gas cap cover actually fits S and R bike as well as the K1200RS and GT.
4. MV Agusta owners: Ever want to be a switch-hitter? Admit it...! We're adults..We now have the all new One-Arm Reversible Rear Wheel Stand from Pit Bull When installed on the left side it allows for rear wheel removal. When installed on the right, it allows for easy sprocket changes or removal.. On the left side, the handle is forward of the bike. On the right side, the handle is behind the bike. Simply the best of both worlds.
5. The tail and brake lights on any MV Agusta are pathetic...Probably an afterthought of the Italians. Unless you are begging someone to give it to you in the a#*.. you need to do something about it.. See the Pirates' Lair MV F4 Hyper-Lite Kit in action at by Clicking HERE Feel the burn...save your a*#!
6. We mentioned in last months newsletter a sale we're having on our custom K1200RS/GT torque arms but since then we got the last shipment of (12) of the Torque Arms with Pirates' Lair logo. The guy that produces these supplies us with about 20 a year.. We have (12) of these limited edition arms. When they are gone.. there will no more. Total production run was 100 units. Unlike our standard custom arm, the "logo" arm comes with (2) 10 x 55mm stainless low head socket bolts and nuts to complete the package. FYI.. This is what I have on MY K1200RS.. These pieces are simple works of art... The question is. Are you worthy? Cost is only $10 more than the standard arm.
7. Ever pull over on the side of the road, put your sidestand down, walk away .. look back and your bike is falling? or already down? Or had your stand sink into a hot blacktop?? or forget that you had a joint stuck behind your ear when you are about to walk through a check point at LAX? We feel ya. We now have Pirates' Lair Kickstand pads emblazoned with a waaay cool Pirate holding a knife in his teeth and our URL spewed all over it... As these things are cheap to produce, we'll probably give some away at rallies..including the upcoming Deals Gap Rally at the end of this month.. or add them to large orders as a freebie... Trying to figure this out...
8. We now offer the Marc Parnes Wheel Balancing Kits for the K1200R/S / R1200GS/ST/RT . The kit comes complete with axle, bearing blocks, and (2) cones ..two universal/one special 137mm cone for the BMW rear drive side. Weights included.
9. The K1200R/K1200S Helmet Lock page is up.
10. We have ordered a few of the Verholen K1200R bar riser kits and their small tank bags for evaluation.
Rally News/Info: Down The Road: 2005
The 6th Annual Deals Gap K12 Rally ...(sponsored by http://www.i-bmw.com/) will again be held at the Tapoco Lodge at the end of this month.. Sept 29th-Oct 1st to be precise. it's the biggest K12 Rally of the year!! Woohoo!! Be there!! Amber and I will be attending..
2006 Hill Country Rally is already in the works!! !
Here's a note from our good pardner James Myrick,... next year's
Finger Lakes i-BMW Group 2005 August 19-21 Further
details to follow coming weeks...stay tuned.
How-To-Survive On A
If you'd like to help others by contributing a How-To-Survive on your Motorcycle, How to Survive Deals Gap, or any How-To link.. First... check out the tips we already have and if you have something new... just send to me and if it's worthy... I'll add it.. Remember.. we're all in this together.. so use deodorant.
Nothing new this month.
Guess that kinda wraps this one up. Ride safe and best wishes for a good summer!.... See ya at Deals Gap!!...